As we all know by now, it's difficult for this blog to not look at popular things and rip them apart and/or break them down. It doesn’t matter if they’re classic tropes from our favorite media or popular videos of stupid rules interpretations that engagement baiters have proliferated. The  trope this particular post covers will be a classic one : You All Meet at an Inn., also sometimes known as You All Meet at a Tavern. While it would probably be enjoyable (and fairly easy), to take this one down a notch this post is going to take a different approach than usual and support the trope's use. You might say this post is "Inn Defense" of the Inn as a starting point in games and stories. So for this week, read along as we fend off the major complaints and extoll the benefits of using the Inn (or Tavern) for your launch.  Where Everybody Knows Your Name “You all meet at an inn (or tavern).” You can probably already hear the players groan as you trot out the time-tested ope...

I don't know poker, not really , but I'm learning. It's the most legendary and storied of card games, especially since bridge, once a cornerstone of suburban American living, has mostly faded into the mists of history. Terms like "fold," "ante," and "wild card" are all part of our general lexicon. Regular "poker nights" provide complex characterization and plot foreshadowing in some of my all-time favorite media, including  M*A*S*H  and  Star Trek: The Next Generation . For all its history and still-visible presence (we all remember the online poker craze about 15 years ago), there's still a certain mystique to the game. Not only because of the dark, smoky rooms the game brings to mind, or the litany of terms and traditions that have amassed over the years, but because poker is about the  player  as much as it's about the game. Analyzing the other players, not only for how the play but psychologically, sniffing out hidden ...

Given the choice, I probably wouldn't have  chosen  to play as a space bug at the time. But there were very, very few games available, let alone games with manuals , let  alone  games with high-quality full-color comic books explaining the story.  Yars' Revenge  had all of these, and it was a space game to boot, so, for perhaps the first time, I fully envisioned myself as something non-humnaoid in taking on the role of an electronic game protagonist. Maybe I could have ignored it, gone with an alternate interpretation that I was simply flying some kind of insect-shaped spacecraft , but the comic (and the map at the back) were simply too  cool  for that. It gave me a weird feeling, what I now know to be called "cognitive dissonance," but I accepted that slapping that cartridge into the Atari 2600 and flipping the "on" switch meant becoming, for however long I'd be playing, something very different. It's not like I wasn't already in love with the...

I’m sure we don’t have to tell you, and our recent post schedule is a reminder -  it’s been a week. It’s been a month, a year. The crushing horror of the daily news makes our daily struggles harder, more draining… and then it only gets worse, in ways you don’t see coming. One of the ways it came this week was the death of John Michael “Ozzy” Osbourne. It’s hit the both of us at Never Say Dice quite hard. Ozzy’s work was a lodestone for both of us, something we’d visit time and again, together and as individuals. We attended multiple Ozzfests together. These “Never Say Disc” posts were begun specifically as a way for us to talk about the anniversary of Black Sabbath’s debut album. Ozzy’s also been family tradition - we both have older siblings who created the space for us to begin our own explorations and from which this one man’s music and, yes, philosophy, would be a constant for both our lives. And now he’s gone. If this medium bears any aspect of who we are, it’s vital that w...

There are generation-defining pieces of genre media, influential works whose presence is immediately felt in everything that comes after it, works in whose facets we can see its peers, its predecessors, and all the many creations it will inspire. And then there’s Back to the Future (1985) , which is somehow the complete opposite. Generation-defining, sure, but also wholly unique to its own vision, an unreplicable artifact, notable entirely for its own brilliance rather than an empire built on its foundation. These actors, these scenes, that direction… there’s really nothing else like it - even the sequels are largely their own things rather than rehashing the original. There were a couple expansions via the short-lived animated series and the much-beloved Telltale adventure game , but on the whole it’s been allowed to simply be - a rarity in today’s media landscapes of constant remakes, reworkings, and rehashes. Back to the Future is a movie that means a lot to us at Never Say Dice, a...

You see, there was going to be a Father's Day post about the way the holiday coincided with the simultaneous No Kings Rallies, Trump Birthday Army 250th Anniversary Parade, Minnesota state government assasinations, and Israel's attacks on Iran. It was going to build on the themes of fatherhood and legacy in the  Metal Gear  franchise, and talk about how the villains are generally motivated by a need to force change for the benefit of future generations. It was going to build on my previous Father's Day post about breaking the cycles of paternal abuse in  Metal Gear , along with the  Yakuza/Like a Dragon  series . And then a series of unforeseen real-world issues came up in my life - nothing catastrophic, but all things that needed to be dealt with immediately... and the post was postponed. No big deal, I thought, Father's Day can be a starting point, but certainly doesn't need to be the focus. I could keep going in the direction I'd already charted.  And t...

Look, I get it. I'm from the X-Files generation. I found the series at a perfect age: the cusp of adolescence, when you start to question the Narrative, and X-Files provided something different from  the honest utopian idealism of Star Trek or Doctor Who 's unfocused Bohemian wanderings through funhouse political allegory and theatrical grotesqueries of the British id. The X-Files was set in the shadows of here and now, dragging us with its protagonists into the cruel and hidden aspects of everything American society and its educational system had taught me to unquestioningly venerate - what restless, dissatisfied teenager wouldn't find themselves bewitched? There was vindication in Mulder and Scully revealing ulterior motives of the military, the government, corporations, and (especially in the earlier days) law enforcement - the adults really were lying! I didn't know it at the time, but I was living through the start of a conspiracy mania - driven to some degree b...

This was going to be some goofy-ass post about how US Presidents in games seem to get themselves kidnapped at a rate rivaling even the least secure princesses. There were going to be references to the semi-titular ninjas in Bad Dudes vs. Dragon Ninja , who seem to consider the White House merely a single stop on a much larger crime spree. Perhaps I am not a Bad Enough Dude to stay the course there, but this President's Day finds me in a sufficient state of fear regarding the office and its holders that I am at a loss to tie the gravity of our situation with quips about never getting an opportunity to play T he President is Missing . (It came with a cassette tape, which seemed impossibly cool and cutting edge when I read about it.) The fact is, Presidents are scary - it's just that most of us haven't often been on the receiving end of the harm they can cause. But Barack Obama's legacy (just to name one) is very different depending on whether you're a financial exec...