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Showing posts with the label Memes

Trashed Compactor

In Dungeons and Dragons , there have been plenty of "trash" spells over the years. Spells you wouldn’t pick, as they won’t be very useful or are too niche to be worth taking up a slot in your roster. Players and GMs alike will argue over these kinds of spells for hours. Likewise, there are plenty of spells and effects that combine to enhance each other. One example would be casting Grease and Fog over the same area, limiting both your enemies' vision and their mobility. If you’re feeling murder hobo-ish, another might be Sleep and Fireball - keeping your enemies in one spot and then flambéing them. What about Trash Compactor? You don’t know what that is? The thought is to Polymorph an enemy into a small or tiny creature, then cast Resilient Sphere (sometimes known as Otiluke’s Resilient Sphere), release the Polymorph, and watch as your enemy is turned into a thick slurry of meat, blood, and bone. If you follow the blog, you’ll know that seeing a ridiculous description wri

Peasant Railgun

Peasants are the common commoner amongst the NPCs of many a tabletop role playing game. It doesn’t matter the setting, there's going to be a variety of "common" NPC that's peasant-like in some way. The subject of peasants has come up in my Dungeons and Dragons gaming group once again as the Peasant Railgun meme makes its way through the internet once again. A crazy idea that's been around for many years. Not sure what we’re talking about? The concept goes something like this: we find a big bad target, line up a group of 2,280 peasants all in a row over the distance of two miles, have them all ready their action, and then have them pass an object (usually a spear) down the line over the course of a six-second round, until it reaches the last person in line who throws the ammo at the target - gaining  "velocity damage" based on falling object damage, and dealing somewhere near 400d6 worth of damage. If this idea sounds ridiculous to you, and you’re a reg

Them Bones

Undead are a common foe (and sometimes companion ) in many a game of Dungeons and Dragons . Sometimes the idiocy of memes make us wish we were dead. One Dungeons and Dragons -related meme floated through my  gaming group this week, and, as you might have guessed, it involved the undead. The meme goes a little something like this:  DM : You have been granted a wish. Cleric : I wish for the power to animate skeletons. DM : You know what? Okay.  [3 sessions later]  Cleric : I animate the bugbear’s skeleton. DM : They’re…they're not dead yet. Cleric : That wasn’t the wish.  [DM realizing what they’ve done, cue picture of shocked James Harden ] Of course, one could easily sub in S urprised Shaq , Shocked Pikachu , or one of a ny number of "surprised" memes . Or, maybe... you just... don’t ? Welcome to a little post series that I like to call "Never Say Dice Ruins Your TTRPG Memes." You may last recall this from our earlier post Divine Bovine . Could the situation pr

Divine Bovine

  As gaming groups are wont to do, mine has recently gotten into the practice of sharing tabletop TikToks and memes. The habit, and shared a-moos-ment, are surely something that can only bring a group closer together. Occasionally though, a shared nugget of media posits a question that warrants a fair amount of discussion. While the latest one the group shared might be udderly ridiculous, I did cowtow to their request and answered their question. After all, everyone at your table wants to be seen and herd (unless they’re a rogue). If you’ve heard this before, I hope you won’t experience any déjà  moo: If a cleric uses "True Resurrection" on an enemy’s leather armor, will a cow form around it? The short answer to this, of course, is... no. This will not work. If you don’t care about the why, you’re welcome to jump to the end of the post. Why won’t this work as the original joke wants? There are several issues here. Just going through the spell description in order, the first p